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Navigating the Journey: How to Deal With a Parent Who Has Dementia 

An adult daughter kisses her mother's hand as the mother stares off into the distance.
• Dementia refers to a category of medical conditions that primarily affect cognitive abilities such as memory and reasoning. 
• You can expect an aging loved one with dementia to experience certain behavioral, mood, and psychological changes. 
• Being mindful of how you communicate, preparing a safe environment, and knowing how to manage agitation are great practical strategies that help when caring for a parent with dementia. 
• Attending support groups, relying on paid caregivers, and stepping away when you are frustrated are some healthy coping mechanisms for family members who are responsible for a mom or dad with dementia. 

If your parent has been diagnosed with dementia, the journey ahead may be a challenging one. 

The good news is that there are some practical steps you can take to ensure your aging loved one with dementia is safe and cared for — and that you are able to cope with your new responsibilities. 

It’s important to know that you’re not alone in this journey. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), more than 55 million people worldwide live with dementia, and there are nearly 10 million new cases each year. 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the thought of caring for someone who has dementia, you’ve come to the right place.  

In this article, we share some of the ways family members can help elderly parents with dementia and strategies to cope as the disease progresses. 

What is Dementia? 

Dementia is a sterm that refers to various medical conditions that affect a person’s cognitive abilities, such as memory and thinking.

This is because dementia is a disease of the brain. One such condition you may be familiar with is Alzheimer’s disease

Dementia typically affects people over the age of 65, and it tends to worsen over time. 

While this may seem unsettling, remember that adults with dementia who are treated with care and compassion can still enjoy their golden years. 

Key Point: The Changes a Person with Dementia Will Experience 
 
Some of the changes a person experiences when they have dementia include: 
 
•Memory loss 
• Losing track of time 
• Trouble communicating or a decline in communication skills 
• Changes in behavior and personality 
• Mood changes that result in verbal or physical aggression 
• Needing assistance with taking care of themselves or with personal activities 
• Becoming disorientated or confused 

Handling Behavior Changes 

Perhaps one of the most concerning things many families have to deal with when a person has dementia is that their behavior and personality may change. 

The best way to handle these changes is to practice patience and compassion. It’s also important not to take anything the person says or does personally. 

  • Some tips for dealing with troubling behavior include: 
  • Acknowledging that you can’t change the person and try to accommodate their behavior. 
  • Remember that you’re always in control of your behavior in any situation. 
  • Consult with a doctor to ensure that there are no other underlying causes of behavioral changes, such as chronic pain. 
  • Keep in mind that certain behaviors may be an indication that a person with dementia needs something. Try to think about what they could be trying to communicate with their actions. 
  • Remain flexible and explore different approaches until you find something that works. 

Managing Frustration and Agitation 

Your aging loved one with dementia might experience something called agitation, which includes irritability, sleeplessness, and even aggression.  

  • Agitation can be triggered by frustration with a situation, fear, or fatigue. Things that may help when your parent is agitated include: 
  • Reducing noise and clutter around the home. 
  • Politely ask people to step out of the room if there are too many crowded around your parent. 
  • Asking questions with yes or no answers to simplify decision-making.  
  • Allowing your aging parent to do as much as they can on their own to give them a sense of independence and control. 
  • Acknowledging how they’re feeling and that they may be frustrated with the loss of control over their life. 
  • Avoid confronting or criticizing your parent’s agitation, which may increase their frustration and anxiety. 

Communicating with a Parent with Dementia 

An elderly loved one with dementia might have difficulty remembering certain words or following along as you speak. 

For this reason, it’s important to think carefully about how you communicate with your mom or dad if they have dementia. 

A younger woman and an elderly woman make eye contact as they speak to each other.

We’ve put together a complete guide on how to talk to someone with Alzheimer’s disease that you may want to read. But here is a quick recap of our pointers: 

  • Avoid asking open-ended questions. 
  • Provide a simple explanation to questions. 
  • Use simple words. 
  • Use visual prompts. 
  • Pay attention to nonverbal communication, such as body language and facial expressions. 
  • Maintain eye contact while talking. 
  • Limit distractions such as noise from a TV. 
  • Speak slowly and clearly. 

Coping with Incontinence  

Although it may not be pleasant to think about, your aging loved one with dementia may eventually lose bladder and bowel control. Here are some ideas to help manage this: 

  • Establish a set routine for using the toilet, such as taking them to the bathroom every two hours. 
  • Use visual cues like signs that indicate where the bathroom is. 
  • Purchase incontinence pads and products like bed liners to avoid accidents that can make your parent feel self-conscious. 
  • Ensure that your loved one is wearing clothing that is easy to remove when you take them to the bathroom. 

Creating a Safe Environment 

People with dementia have a high risk of falling or having other accidents, often due to their physical environment.  

So it’s essential that you take steps to ensure their living space is as safe as possible. 

We’ve spoken before about what you can do to dementia-proof your aging loved one’s home. Here are some highlights of safety features to consider: 

  • Store medications safely so that there is no risk that your aging loved one takes too much. 
  • Install shower chairs or handrails in the bathroom. A rubber mat on the floor of the shower may help too. 
  • Ensure there is no loose carpeting that could be tripped over. 
  • Sharp objects and electrical appliances should be locked away. 
  • Ensure there is adequate lighting throughout the home and that your loved one can reach the switches easily. 
  • Avoid busy patterns on wallpaper, sheets, and curtains, as this may disorientate your elderly loved one. 

Coping Strategies for Family Caregivers 

If you are an adult child caring for a parent or family member with dementia, there are some things you can do to cope with the situation.  

Attend support groups 

Support groups can help you learn from others in the same situation as you.  

Hearing from people who are experiencing the same thing may also give you a new perspective on your own circumstances. 

Lean on other family members 

There’s nothing wrong with asking for help. Don’t be afraid to speak to your family members about the support you need to care for your aging parent — other adult children in your family may be able to help out from time to time. 

Invest in in-home care 

Hiring a home health aide to handle dementia care for your aging parent might be an option you want to consider.  

Older man sits on couch as a nurse gently places her hand on his shoulder.

Trying to do it all on your own can be stressful and demanding, especially as dementia progresses. 

Remove yourself from the situation when you need to 

It can be hard to stay calm and practice patience all the time when caring for a parent with dementia. You may feel frustrated and even despondent at times. 

It’s important to prioritize your own well-being, especially if you are a family caregiver. Step away, take some deep breaths, and allow yourself to feel your emotions.  

This is by no means an easy situation to deal with, so don’t be too hard on yourself if you feel like you’re not getting it right.  

The Ideal Solution for Caring for Parents Living with Dementia 

We know just how difficult it is to care for a parent with dementia, which is why we’ve put plenty of thought into designing our medical alert devices

Take our Freedom Alert Plus, for example. We’ve considered every element of an emergency situation that may involve someone with dementia.  

As a result, we’ve created a modern device that can detect falls, connect to emergency services, or alert caregivers that help is needed. 

Investing in a medical alert device not only helps aging adults with dementia have more independence but it also helps family caregivers rest easy knowing that help is available at the touch of a button.  

Visit our website to learn more about how the Freedom Alert Plus and our other medical alert devices can help you take care of a parent with dementia. 

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